Freddy's Freedom Fighters

I have been commissioned by President Bush and the Department of Homeland Security, along with Defense Secretary Robert Gates, to recruit people interested in banding together for a trip to the Middle East to rid the world of Al-Qaeda. Similar to Roosevelt's Rough Riders, we will be called Freddy's Freedom Fighters. The plan begins with destroying Al-Qaeda in Afghanistan, moving on to strike the same fate upon Al-Qaeda in Pakistan, then finally defeating evil-doers in Iran while conducting reconnoissance on its nuclear capabilities. If you are interested in joining me for this historic battle, let me know.

Because our nation's economy is sagging and because General David Petraeus advises this be a cloak and dagger operation, we must provide our own transportation. I have secured plane reservations from cheaptickets.com.

By the way, we are in need of supplies, so if you or anyone you know can provide the following, the world will be grateful: guns, tents, food, water, backpacks, tanks, maps, compasses, and anything else pertinent to fighting guerrilla warfare. Also, if you could tell me where these countries are, or where the Middle East is for that matter, we would be appreciative.